Thursday, September 05, 2013

There Is Light, Though It Be Dim

Moving is not just an act of packing boxes, loading a truck and adjusting to a new home, but an act of moving on; moving on and moving forward.

Saying goodbye to a place of comfort is difficult. Always... it's a challenge for the heart to give up the normal. I don't think this is unusual for most people. In spite of what's considered normal, I still find myself struggling to say goodbye to the routine, the habits and the well-trod land I've walked for a couple years in our last home. This land becomes my land... my place. My place is where I find comfort.

Saying goodbye to the people I've grown to love is intensely challenging. There is a loyalty and trust in relationships that have been fostered with tenderness and joy. Leaving these relationships is a massive sacrifice for a person like myself. After several relocations, I've grown to realize that once I am out of sight, I am also out of mind. Three or four weeks pass and those friendships I've held dear no longer call, check in or keep me in the loop. This is natural, and a painful loss.

Moving on after a relocation is a mental and emotional balance of letting go, and being okay with it. The act of "being okay with it" takes discipline and a willingness to step out on faith that things are going to be great... eventually. 

Knowing something is going to be difficult is all well and good... until I'm in the midst of that difficulty. Combine these things: eating alone, spouse works a fourteen hour day, boxes everywhere, child is belligerent, it's humid, and I'm already depressed. This leads to questioning everything I knew would be difficult. It's hella hard, and I want to blame someone... kick and cry! Everything's fine, seemingly. But the heart hurts and these tough days are all it takes to push my heart over the edge.

And then, that day passes. The next day is better. There is light, though it be dim. Redemption comes in spite of our inability or unwillingness to see it. Dwelling on the difficulty is not moving on and though it's tempting, moving forward is the only way to truly move. Remaining stagnant after a relocation leads to a sunken heart. This heart becomes unable to see the redemption that is lit by that dim light.

This life we've been called to live is not our own to claim. If we have been challenged to move by our maker, the only way to move is forward. Move toward the goodness, rich relationships, and intense beauty that can only come from a willingness to accept the gain of the past. Move forward toward a brighter future. 

...faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. Hebrews 11:1




2 comments:

  1. Thank you for this post. I really needed it today.

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  2. Wonderful post. Your statement, "Redemption comes in spite of our inability or unwillingness to see it", reminds me of a passage I've held on to for several weeks now, Romans 5:1-5. I won't quote it all here, but a few snippets are... "right in God's sight... peace... undeserved privilege where we now stand... confidently and joyfully... endurance... character... hope... because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love. (!) Thank you for sharing :)

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