Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Renewed Thankfulness

My last post was six days ago... and I must admit, I should have posted since then. Almost within twenty-four hours of posting my heart and sadness, the fog lifted and I began to see the rays of joy come back into my life (partially due to all the love and support I received in response to my post). It seems unfair that I would leave that last post just hanging in the midst.

All of that being said, life has progressed forward and in the ebb and flow of things I find myself able to look out and see all I am thankful for. The past few days have been busy, social and joyous. I once again, feel in control of my own life (not ashamed to admit my need for the allusion of control) and have the confidence to pick right up where I left off. I feel it absolutely necessary to share that which I am thankful for at this moment in time:
  • I am thankful my husband has a job. Not only am I thankful for his job, but I am thankful that he is happy, fulfilled and encouraged by his responsibilities,the people he works with and his personal achievements in these positions. It is an overwhelming feeling to know the person I've chosen to spend my life with is content.
  • I am thankful for my little boy. Yes... I am thankful I have a child in my life... but not just any child... Lucas. I am thankful for Lucas... and all his quirks (he is, at the moment, body-slamming Keith Richards, Felix, Monster-Man and Pooh'ed... who all suffer the fate of sleeping in his crib with him). His personality. His face. His tush. Everything that makes him special. 
  • I am thankful for our church. Missio Dei has been a very encouraging community for Matt & I. We all share the authentic heart of Christ. I find myself lifted by a few very specific gals and I don't believe they even know how encouraging their words, hugs and emails have been for me. This community not only has a vision I respect, but a people I've grown to love.
  • I am thankful for my friend Erin. She is my closest friend here in Salt Lake, and honestly, I don't know what I'd do if I didn't get an email, text or FB message from her at least once a day. I thrive on our communication. Not only has our friendship been a miracle, but it's been joyous. She is a light in my dark days and icing on the cake in my best days!
  • I am thankful for my friendships back in Portland (that includes you, Julie). They keep me balanced and they know my heart. These individuals speak truth into my life and pull me from my self-pity and loathing. They've loved me in my ugliest moments and continue to love me, in spite of the eight-hundred mile distance and one hour time difference.
  • I am thankful for my Netflix. Don't judge me, people!
  • I am thankful for the city we live in. Salt Lake has been surprisingly wonderful. I am continually impressed with the people, the sights (oh, the mountains!) and all the family-oriented activities (oh, the Mormons!). It's a perfect time of life for us to be here, and I couldn't be more happy with God's choice for us. I only hope we can bless this city in return.
So there you have it. Obviously, this is a small glimpse of what I'm thankful for right now. If I continued beyond this list... I'd have four-hundred reasons (and more) to be thankful for. I'd add things like, the chocolate shop across the street, or Smith's constant cheese clearance. Those are valid things to be thankful for... but probably not character building. So I won't include those in my current list.

As you may become aware, every day is a battle for me. A battle to keep my spirits high, my eyes on the Lord, and my focus outward. And most days, it's an easy battle to win. But last week was rough, and I hate to admit it, but those weeks happen. Moving into a new community always heightens my sense of inferiority and feelings of isolation, which makes all of the above an even more difficult task. But, the Lord sustains us all and every day is a new day to try again.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Romans 15:13 

Salt Lake's Wasatch Mountain Front
*I stole the above photo from THIS website. But seriously, this is what we see every day. How could I NOT be thankful for that?! Gor-gee-us!!!

1 comment:

  1. What a great post, Bethany. It's a good reminder for all of us to step back during a more difficult day or time, and remember that we have so much to be thankful for. I have to tell you, though, that your previous post didn't leave me feeling like there was anything WRONG with you. It just made me feel normal!!! Isn't great to have other women (ACK! I never call myself a woman!) to relate to?